Day Ninety-Nine
I didn't mean to, but I was up for hours in the night. By morning, I needed to sleep in. I know, I know--is there ever a day that doesn't start out this way? I used to honestly go to bed at seven, get up at three, do two hours at the gym, and get to work by six-thirty. Those were the days. (I was slim, too.) (And young.)
Nevertheless, I did the elliptical and abs and weight-lifting to a very good degree. It was the routine with the free weights, where someone usually puts them away between sets. No one put them away. I had forgotten to bring my iPod, so I couldn't listen to music. All I had was my phone, and I only have one song on it. So, what do you think I did?
I listened to true crime. Instead of changing my routine song by song, I did three minutes on the elliptical in narrow mode, then raced the fourth minute, then switched to medium mode for three more minutes, racing the fourth minute. Then I would get off to do abs (till they were done) and weight-lifting. I did full abs, and three full sets of weight-lifting, with the stomach part four times. MInutes on the elliptical? Sixty.
I mean, pretty dang good, right?
My weight was not great--just ten down. I have, like two days to go here. I have not eaten sugar at all--I have kept that promise. But I think I have been eating a little more than I needed to the last few days. I think that I have been self-sabotaging. Why? I asked myself that while I showered. I think it's because it's hard for me to make such a huge effort. To me, it's totally worth it to make an effort, keep a rule--IF I get the results I want. But making the effort and NOT getting the results I want? Totally not worth it. If I suspect I am not going to get the results I want, I think I really don't want to make the effort.
I wish I were the girl who could do it, anyway, just because it's the right thing to do. But I don't think I am that girl. Not totally, anyway. I think I had to do this in order to learn more about myself, and I think I have learned a ton.
Anyway, I made myself wait until 11:30 to eat. This should not have been hard, since it was 11:10 when I got out of the shower. But i was HUNGRY. I made my eggs, slowly, and worked on drying my hair and so forth. I pulled my eggs off the stove at 11:28. I waited because I think I really need to keep my rules, whatever they may be. If I don't, then I can expect to be totally out of control and gaining weight. And that is not the me I want.
I had lunch not long after--leftover chicken and rice. I remembered to drink some water, and I also had a small glass of tomato juice that I have been forgetting I have chilling.
Then I went shopping. I tell you what--my feet HURT today. I could barely walk on my right one. I get that I wore myself out a little more than usual on the elliptical, but this was ridiculous. I am going to have to schedule that surgery soon. I had to go to three stores. I took a son to get a haircut. I completed my laundry. I practiced the organ. I made dinner. I made myself do my night-time abs. I am going to go to bed right away, super early, I think. I am really tired. You know--the tired when you're so tired that the work it is to go to bed seems totally not doable? I've been counting off the ten or so things I had to do before I was ready for bed, and I think I just have flossing and brushing my teeth left to do.
I ended up with two hot cocoas tonight, because I forgot to use my dinner milk in the first one, and it was still sitting there.
I know how silly I am.
Nevertheless, I did the elliptical and abs and weight-lifting to a very good degree. It was the routine with the free weights, where someone usually puts them away between sets. No one put them away. I had forgotten to bring my iPod, so I couldn't listen to music. All I had was my phone, and I only have one song on it. So, what do you think I did?
I listened to true crime. Instead of changing my routine song by song, I did three minutes on the elliptical in narrow mode, then raced the fourth minute, then switched to medium mode for three more minutes, racing the fourth minute. Then I would get off to do abs (till they were done) and weight-lifting. I did full abs, and three full sets of weight-lifting, with the stomach part four times. MInutes on the elliptical? Sixty.
I mean, pretty dang good, right?
My weight was not great--just ten down. I have, like two days to go here. I have not eaten sugar at all--I have kept that promise. But I think I have been eating a little more than I needed to the last few days. I think that I have been self-sabotaging. Why? I asked myself that while I showered. I think it's because it's hard for me to make such a huge effort. To me, it's totally worth it to make an effort, keep a rule--IF I get the results I want. But making the effort and NOT getting the results I want? Totally not worth it. If I suspect I am not going to get the results I want, I think I really don't want to make the effort.
I wish I were the girl who could do it, anyway, just because it's the right thing to do. But I don't think I am that girl. Not totally, anyway. I think I had to do this in order to learn more about myself, and I think I have learned a ton.
Anyway, I made myself wait until 11:30 to eat. This should not have been hard, since it was 11:10 when I got out of the shower. But i was HUNGRY. I made my eggs, slowly, and worked on drying my hair and so forth. I pulled my eggs off the stove at 11:28. I waited because I think I really need to keep my rules, whatever they may be. If I don't, then I can expect to be totally out of control and gaining weight. And that is not the me I want.
I had lunch not long after--leftover chicken and rice. I remembered to drink some water, and I also had a small glass of tomato juice that I have been forgetting I have chilling.
Then I went shopping. I tell you what--my feet HURT today. I could barely walk on my right one. I get that I wore myself out a little more than usual on the elliptical, but this was ridiculous. I am going to have to schedule that surgery soon. I had to go to three stores. I took a son to get a haircut. I completed my laundry. I practiced the organ. I made dinner. I made myself do my night-time abs. I am going to go to bed right away, super early, I think. I am really tired. You know--the tired when you're so tired that the work it is to go to bed seems totally not doable? I've been counting off the ten or so things I had to do before I was ready for bed, and I think I just have flossing and brushing my teeth left to do.
I ended up with two hot cocoas tonight, because I forgot to use my dinner milk in the first one, and it was still sitting there.
I know how silly I am.
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